What's Your Grief Podcast (general)

In this episode we're going deep, talking about a very common but rarely discussed issue in grief: existential dread. Loss can make us face big questions about life and purpose. It makes us face our own mortality. This week we talk about what it's like to gaze long into the abyss. We reflect on our own discomfort with death (and our comfort with that discomfort). 

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG hub for grief learning and connection. Open for summer cohort through May 31, 2023 and will then reopen in the autumn. It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

You can also make a donation here any time to help us keep the lights on. 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print ebook or audible. 

Direct download: existential_pod.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:20am EDT

May is here and that means the looming grief triggers of Mother's Day and Father's Day are upon us. In this episode we cover all the basics - why it's hard, who is impacted (spoiler alert: it isn't just bereaved parents and bereaved children), and some suggestions for coping. 

We have tons of Mother's Day and Father's Day articles and support over on What's Your Grief.  Start with some of our favorites.

Other mentions from the episode: Honest Obituaries site.

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print ebook or audible. 

Direct download: Mothers_Day_Fathers_Day.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:53pm EDT

Anxiety is one of those grief experiences that is incredibly common and yet often catches people off guard. If you experienced difficult levels of anxiety before a loss, it can feel worse than ever as you navigate grief. And even if you never struggled with managing anxiety before, your loss can bring it up. In this episode we talk about the relationship between grief and anxiety, some common reasons for it, and offer some suggestions on how to manage it. 

Here are the two of the anxiety workbooks we mentioned:
Anxiety and Phobia Workbook
Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print ebook or audible. 

 

Direct download: Anxiety.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:59pm EDT

This week we're reflecting on what's were doing here. Not in the existential sense (though we're certainly always angsting about that on some level). But in the sense that we're curious what you want to hear more of. We hope you'll give a listen and then answer these 3 (very simple) questions to help guide our future episodes. https://form.jotform.com/230677758851066

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print ebook or audible. 

Direct download: Podcast_about_Podcast.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:42am EDT

Though there have been significant losses in our lives in the decades since, each of us looks back to the deaths of a parent early in life as formative to our lives and specifically our work in grief. In this episode, we reflect on the ways those remote personal losses still surprise us - even now. 

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print or on audible, for those of youOur book is available anywhere you buy books:

Direct download: Feb_21_pod.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:54pm EDT

Litsa's flying solo this week, answering questions about grief submitted on Instagram. Talking about supporting partners, siblings, navigating grief conversations with friends, plushies, and more!

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $8.33/month if you join annually and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whatsyourgrief.com/online-grief-community/ 

If you're a grief professional, we have a community for you too. https://whatsyourgrief.com/grief-professionals-community/

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print or on audible, for those of youOur book is available anywhere you buy books:

Direct download: IG_AMA_trimmed.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:00am EDT

This week we were feeling the post-Thanksgiving emotional grief hangover. That means musings on family, holidays past and present, and the ways we grieve the things we assumed would always be part of our lives, but aren't. 

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $10/month and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print or on audible, for those of youOur book is available anywhere you buy books:

Social stuff:

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: Holiday_Change.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:53am EDT

This week we talk about yet another unexpected aspect of grieving - realizing that we in many ways grieve the past, the present, and the future. This expands on a few things we talked about in the nonfinite grief episode, so make sure you catch that one too. 

We don't have ads or a patreon. What helps us most is if you join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more.  It is only $10/month and it is a big part of what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Also, if you like the podcast we're pretty sure you'll like the book! And you can get it in print or on audible, for those of youOur book is available anywhere you buy books:

Social stuff:

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: pastpresnt_future.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:20pm EDT

This week we're answering a listener question about how to cope when the differences in family grief styles start to cause strain between family members. 

Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Our book is available anywhere you buy books:

Social stuff:

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

 

Direct download: November_1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:46am EDT

In this episode we talk about the little-discussed, but incredibly common experience of nonfinite grief. This is an experience that can happen after a death, but also after countless nondeath losses. 

Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Our book is available anywhere you buy books:

Social stuff:

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: nonfinite_pod.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:11pm EDT

This week we're discussing when and why grief can leave you with a mountain of ugly, mean, and messy feelings. 

Join the WYG member community for grief education, connection, accountability, a grief book club & more. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Our book is available anywhere you buy books:

Social stuff:

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: grief_ugly_podcast.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:59pm EDT

You've sent us your grief questions; we've done our best to share some answers. Or at least talk through some thoughts. How do you handle it when people make assumptions about your grief that are all wrong? How do you strengthen continued bonds? (And some rambling on sleep to boot). 

Join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club. Plus, you can watch the live stream of us recording each week. $10/month and it is what keeps the podcast going - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/    

Our book is available anywhere you buy books:

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: pod9.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:56pm EDT

In this episode, Eleanor and Litsa talk about a question that has created some disagreement on social media recently: do we 'recover' from grief? 

Our book is available anywhere you buy books:

To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/   

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: Do_We_Recover_From_Grief_.m4a
Category:general -- posted at: 6:42pm EDT

Our book is available for pre-order (and you can even get a free digital download companion thank you here for pre-ordering). Order it today for delivery on the release date - September 27, 2022:

Become a WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along --  https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/   

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: september_9.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:38pm EDT

Our book is available for pre-order here (with a free digital workbook download if you pre-order!)

To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/   

Read more articles about grief and anger here.

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: Podcast__Anger.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:19am EDT

Our book is available for pre-order here (with a free digital workbook download if you pre-order!)

To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/   

Read more articles about the passage of time

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: WYG_Podcast__Time.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:06am EDT

Needless to say, it's been a while! But we're back with an exciting announcement. 

To join the WYG member community, where we have tons of grief education, support, connection, a book club, and where you can watch the live stream of us recording and chat along - https://whats-your-grief-community.circle.so/   -

As always, follow us on social

Instagram

Facebook

Twitter 

Pinterest

TikTok

Direct download: Were_Back_1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:07am EDT

After a death we do a lot of looking backwards. We think about what we should have known or done differently. We imagine a different world, and ideal world, if things had just taken another path. This becomes wound up in our grief - we beat ourselves up for the past based on things we can only know in the present. In this episode we talk through what that looks like, why we do it, and how to avoid getting sucked too far down the blackholes of counterfactual thinking and hindsight bias in grief. 

Direct download: Grief-Hindsight-Mixed.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:57am EDT

What we believe about grief often starts from a young age. We get messages from family, friends, community, and the media about what grief is 'supposed' to look like. Those messages become beliefs and those beliefs have a very real impact on the way we judge our grief (and often ourselves!). Today we're talking about the ins and outs - where to we get these ideas about grieving and how to they affect us?

Direct download: Grief-Expectations-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 9:49am EDT

Terms like delayed grief and absent grief get thrown around a lot. Recently, people have been suggesting that distancing may be putting people's grief 'on hold'. In this episode, we talk about whether grief is ever 'on hold', how external circumstances can have a very real impact on grieving, and why delayed grief can sometimes happen. Oh, and we do some musing about our own grief. 

Direct download: WYG-Grief-On-Hold_Mixed.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:48pm EDT

In this episode we ramble and reflect out loud a bit, so don't say we didn't warn you.  Thinking about the ways grief has us doing mental math calculations up, down, and sideways. How old would he be now? She's been gone longer than we were married . . . How many more years until I am the age he was when he died? And on and on. Talking about grief math and the what-ifs and doing some personal processing of our own grieving as we go. 

Direct download: WYG-E08-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:57pm EDT

Though positive psychology may sound like a field that is all about just thinking happy thoughts, nothing could be further from the truth. This well-researched, practical approach to boosting well-being is a WYG when it comes to grief and coping. In this episode we're talking about PERMA and challenging you to some momentum from the school of positive psychology. 

Direct download: WYG-E7-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:46am EDT

When the world changes, the way we operate in the world has to change. Grief forces us to make new decisions about the things we do, the things we don't do, and how we cope. Today we talk about how so many of those decisions may feel good in the short term, but often don't serve us in the long-run. Avoidance sounds like it is obvious, but sometimes it hides in corners we don't even recognize. 

Direct download: A-Lesson-In-Avoidance-Final-Mix.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:38pm EDT

When a lot of time has passed after a loss, we hear all sorts of questions - is it too late for counseling? Is it too late to reconnect with people I lost touch with? Is it too late to ask for stories and memories? We're pretty strong believers that, in grief, it is never too late. 

Direct download: WYG-In-Grief-Is-It-Ever-Too-Late-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 10:55am EDT

There is a lot of discussion right now about the many ways people are experiencing grief - the grief of death related losses, but also many other types of grief that are coming up in the world. Today we're sorting through 7 types of grief we think may be relevant and impacting you right now. 

Direct download: WYG-E5-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:03am EDT

We received a question recently about talking to children about people who have died, especially those people the child never met. We get questions like this a lot. Is it normal? Is it okay? Will it screw up my kids? The quick answers: yes! yes! no! For the long answers, tune in. 

Direct download: WYG-E4-MIXED.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:12pm EDT

We did an "Ask Us Anything" on Instagram and turns out your grief questions were a little too big to answer on Instagram. So today we are answering some of your pressing questions about grief - from widow dating to friends disappearing after a death, we're covering some tough topics in less than 35 minutes. Have a question you would like to see us cover? Email us at whatsyourgrief@gmail.com

Direct download: WYG_E2_MIXED_with_music.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 4:26pm EDT

With over 150 million social media users in the US alone, we can no longer conceptualize grief support and support systems without considering online social interaction.

As the co-founders of multiple online spaces, we believe online platforms provide grieving people with powerful tools for connecting and coping in the wake of loss. However, just like in real life, online spaces and interactions can, at times, be difficult to navigate.

Intro by tom_luft (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/tom_luft/34080

Notes: www.whatsyourgrief.com/wygpodcast

Direct download: Utilizing_Social_Media_While_Grieving.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:34pm EDT

Pixar must have a secret deal with Kleenex. They seemed determined to bring audiences to tears with every movie they make. This is fine by us, though, because these tender and relatable films make great teachable moments for children and adults alike.

In this episode of the WYG podcast, we take a look at themes related to grief and death in Pixar's latest movie, Coco.


Intro by tom_luft (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/tom_luft/34080

Direct download: Pixar_and_Coco.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 7:34pm EDT

We're back after a brief hiatus with an update on WYG and our plans for the future of this podcast. We're especially interested in talking about grief in current events, pop-culture, and the world around us and the ways these depictions help us and hurt.

Intro by tom_luft (c) copyright 2011 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. http://dig.ccmixter.org/files/tom_luft/34080

Direct download: podcast_1_-_31318_1.23_PM.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:58pm EDT

Sigmund Freud first proposed the concept of ‘defense mechanisms’ as an element of his influential theory of personality. For those of you who took Psych 101, think back to the Id, Ego, and Superego in which all elements, with the exception of the ego, reside in the unconscious. Since their introduction, the concept of defense mechanisms has been expanded quite a bit, and they are still used today to try to understand certain behavioral patterns. In this episode of the What’s Your Grief Podcast, we discuss how people sometimes use defense mechanisms to cope with grief.

 

0:00 - 4:30: Introductions

Ongoing and Upcoming eCourses

Upcoming events

4:30 - 29:00: Using Defense Mechanisms in Grief

Denial

Regression

Projection

Displacement

Intellectualization

Undoing

Humor

Sublimation

Altruism

Post: Using Defense Mechanisms in Grief

Post: 31 Psychological Defense Mechanisms via Psychologist World

 

Direct download: defense_mechanims.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 11:38am EDT

Many people have to return to work within days after experiencing the death of a loved one. Others have a little more flexibility, but must eventually take the step to return to the workplace and workforce.

In this podcast the girls of What's Your Grief discuss returning to work after the death of a loved one. They address some of the common barriers and offer suggestions for reducing stress during this transition.

0:00 - 5:40: Announcements

5:40 - 15:00: Things we've watched and read about grief

15:00 - 35:00: Returning to work after the death of a loved one

What's Your Grief

Direct download: back_to_work.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:48pm EDT

Season 2: Episode 3: Dating a Widower and Other Topics

0:00 - 5:00 : NFDA Conference Impressions

The intersection between grief support and funeral homes

5:00 - 13:45: Talk of a Lifetime

Have the Talk of a Lifetime: Conversations around family history, legacy, and how people want to be remembered 

Talk of a Lifetime cards and conversation starters

13:45 - 15:50: National Alliance for Grieving Children

New book: When Someone Dies: A Child-Caregiver Activity Book

Child Grief Awareness Month: November is Child Grief Awareness Month

15:50 - 19: 15: Grief in the Media

This is Us

19:15 - 32:00: Reader Question - Dating a widower

Direct download: Season_2_episode_3.1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:57pm EDT

In this episode of the What's Your Grief podcast we discuss the new grief website, Grief in Six Words, adjusting to the school year after a death, answer a reader's question about grief counseling and discuss a few times that grief has made us feel like mean and ugly people.

  • Minute 0:00 - 3:00: Introduction
  • Minute 3:00 - 10:00: Grief in Six Words Website
  • Minute 10:00 - 15:30: Update on the WYG Bookclub
  • Minute 15:30 - 21:30: Adjusting to the school year after a death
  • Minute 21:30 - 26:30: Reader Question
  • Minute 26:30 - 33:00: A few of the times grief has made us feel like ugly or mean people

If you have a grief question that you would like to hear answered on the podcast, or a recommendation for a resource, book, song, movie, etc, please email us at whatsyourgrief@gmail.com

Direct download: podcast_season_2_episode_2.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 2:30pm EDT

Loneliness in Grief and Other Topics

Welcome to Season 2, Episode 1 of the What's Your Grief Podcast. This season we're going to shake up our format a little and cover several different topics during each 30 minute episode. In this episode we talk about some of the new resources WYG has to offer; grief reading and movies; and we discuss the concept of loneliness in grief.

  • Minute 0:00 - 5:00: Introductions
  • Minute 5:00 - What's new with WYG
  • Minute 10:30 - Resource shout out
  • Minute 12:15 - Grief books and movies
  • Minute 16:00 - The unique loneliness of grief

If you have a grief question that you would like to hear answered on the podcast, or a recommendation for a resource, book, song, movie, etc, please email us at whatsyourgrief@gmail.com

 

Notes Page: http://www.whatsyourgrief.com/forty-one/

Direct download: WYG_Podcast_Season_2_Episode_1.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 3:49pm EDT

In this episode of the What’s Your Grief podcast, we answer your questions about coping with holiday grief.

  • I’m worried the holidays will be very sad and glum. How can I be strong for everyone?
  • My loved one just died and now the holidays are here, what do I do?
  • The anniversary of my loved one’s death is right around the holidays, what do I do?
  • Is it okay if I skip the holidays altogether?
  • How do I politely respond to people who ask why I don’t like/celebrate the holidays?
  • How do I deal with feeling like a third wheel at holiday celebrations?
  • How do I support my grieving children at the holidays?

Show notes: www.whatsyourgrief.com/thirty-one

Direct download: holiday_2015.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 1:27pm EDT

1